Mike's Hard Lemonade (5e Spell)

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You summon 1d4 cold, crisp bottles of Mike's Hard Lemonade^TM, now handcrafted to remove gluten. On subsequent turns, you can use an action to drink one bottle, causing the refreshingly tasty and surprisingly low calorie alcoholic beverage to heal you for 1 hitpoint. Alternatively, you can use an action to hurl a bottle of delicious and nutritious Mike's Hard Lemonade^TM at a creature. The resulting Flavor Blast deals 1d4 acid damage to all creatures within a 5 ft. radius. This spell’s damage increases by 1d6 when you reach 5th level (2d4), 11th level (3d4), and 17th level (4d4)

Any creatures who regain hitpoints or lose hitpoints as a result of the Mike's Hard Lemonade^TM spell, which critics say is like "drinking a bottle of summer lovin'", are not allowed to operate land, sea, or air machinery for the following 120 minutes. Creatures who attempt to do so anyway will immediately summon a Police Officer who will attempt to detain you in a way determined by the DM.

Mike's is hard. So is prison.

3.75

(4 votes)

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