Grog of Substantial Whimsy (3.5e Equipment)

April Fools!
This content is not designed for use in regular games, and may affect overall balance and gameplay. Take caution when using this material.

Grog of Substantial Whimsy: Brewed from the talents of the finest senile wizards, the magic of chaotic absurdity now comes to the player at such a low price! It's mainly a tool used for adding quirks and perks to give the player's characters a little more character!

The goal was to make magical effects that neither help or improve the PC, nor majorly stunt the player's ability to play.

Each grog can at max have 4 effects. If the PC gets the same effect, the effect is canceled. PC cannot have the same effect twice in each individual grog.

Effects are considered curses and are affected by the spell Remove Curse.

CL <!-Caster level for creation-->; ; Market Price: 30 gp

Grog of Substantial Whimsy
D1000 Effects
1PC suddenly remembers that they've been lying about who they are the whole time, and are actually someone else entirely.
2PC becomes a reusable spell component. (any semi-competent mage will be able to notice this)
3PC can Wish the death of one being, but will also die.
4PC can access their brain by unscrewing the top of their skull.
5PC's mouth lets out light, illuminating 5 ft. in front of the PC whenever it's open.
6PC is unknowingly inducted into a secret society.
7PC can speak with domestic fowl, but they tend to lie to the PC.
8PC sees dead people who bother them a lot.
9The PC, and the PC’s party learns the 5 minute ritual to summon the PC. (Just a pentagram, nothing fancy)
10Roll again, effect behaves like an STD.
11PC can summon a demon, but only has a 10% chance of controlling it. (Demons notoriously hate anyone who summons them)
12PC can resurrect another creature once per year.
13The tip of the PC's thumb can be lit harmlessly like a candle.
14PC becomes a dragon in a human form with the same stats as they had before, but has forgotten how to polymorph.
15Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
16PC can concentrate to have background music play for them. (DC 15) concentration, 1d20 rounds.
17PC thinks magic is actually impossible, and won't accept it. Refers to it as "witchcraft" and "nonsense"
18PC loses 1d2 feet in height, their clothes & armor amazingly still fit.
19PC is now much more comfortable around the (un)dead than the living.
20Any casted magic that affects the PC causes them to be soaked in lamp oil.
21The next sword that hits the PC receives a permanent +1 bonus.
22PC can no longer kill anything.
23PC’s middle name becomes “Wonder Noodle” and must always say their full name when asked.
24When PC is angry, their hair erupts into a harmless flame.
25PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
26PC can exist comfortably in harsh environments for 10 minutes/day
27Every week, the PC must sacrifice an enemy or gain a -1 penalty to all ability scores and saves, increasing by 1 every day that an enemy isn't sacrificed. A special sacrificial dagger appears in the PC's inventory and cannot be used for anything but a killing blow. It is also bound to the PC.
28At the start of every encounter the PC must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
29PC’s organs will never fail, even if removed.
30Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the affect.
31PC's dream semi-manifest in reality. (Like warped trees, or obscurely built buildings. At DMs discretion)
32PC gains Thaumaphilia, an intense fascination with magic.
33Flowers grow out of the spots where the PC walks.
34PC seemingly ‘walks on air’ and is permanently 5 inches above all solid surfaces.
35PC becomes pregnant. Does not matter what sex, if any, the PC is. 01-49% = boy, 50-98% girl, 99-100% other. Will be a clone of the PC & a normal nine month pregnancy. Morning sickness & other symptoms apply as DM sees fit.
36One of the PC's permanent effects or injuries are cured! If they don't have one, re-roll for one.
37PC's bones turn to wood, and can live off sunlight. When they go up an age group, they go up a size category as well as receiving the penalties of aging.
38PC gains wonderful plumage.
39PC becomes so good at flexing, they will rip through whatever clothing and/or armor they're wearing making it worthless unless they get it repaired.
40PC’s body becomes an orangutan. (no stat change)
41PC forgets a random language.
42PC realizes the meaning of life, but is unable to tell anyone else. They are also hunted by cults (and maybe gods) who want to know.
43PC sprouts a tree on their head. Extends lifespan x5000. Tree will grow until too heavy for person, enveloping them and taking root. Person will become immobile tree. Retains personality and speech.
44Lung capacity enlarges harmlessly. Can hold breath for 20 minutes.
45PC is owed 1 favor by a random god.
46PC thinks "They" are after them. Whoever "They" are.
47PC's face has the same properties as catnip. (A cat allergy may be included at DMs discretion)
48Arcane markings (Explosive Runes) appear on skin permanently, cannot be removed even if the skin is.
49PC falls madly in love with random party member. DC 25 to get over themselves, can only make save 1/month.
50PC’s dreams are replaced with visions of drinking a particular drink in a particular tavern.
51PC becomes aware of how to process opiates and meth.
52PC's stomach now functions similarly to a bag of holding.
53When the PC is asleep, their consciousness leaves their body in the shape of their favourite mundane animal to fuddle about.
54PC's shadow does not do the same thing as the PC. It is the same size, and does not leave no matter what time of day.
55PC is haunted by nightmares of a lost island that holds extraordinary improbable animals.
56PC gains an imaginary friend who tells them to kill everyone they meet.
57PC can bathe in moonlight, and is squeaky clean the morning after.
58If the PC punches an ally, they forget who the PC is.
59PC switches ears with the next race they come into contact with. (Ears will shrink/grow proportionally for all involved)
60The PC becomes either an herbivore or a carnivore. (50% chance of either. Any food of the other kind will induce vomiting)
61PC can easily climb trees like a cat, or a monkey.
62PC develops Thaumaphobia, an intense fear of magic.
63PC can chop non-magical wood with their bare hands.
64PC's age fluctuates ± 10 years each day.
65PC's breath is a light flurry of snow.
66PC cannot exit through the same way they entered.
67Whenever the PCs rolls a 20 on a 1d20, they are compelled to shout “[PC’s name] strikes again!”
68PC lays an egg (regardless of sex). (What kind is DMs choice.)
69PC no longer gives off any indication that they are alive (or undead). Is not detected by detect life or detect undead.
70PC learns to understand the next language they hear that they don’t currently know.
71If the PC hears their name, they petrify for 2d4 rounds.
72PC's presence causes holy symbols to glow red. Including mundane ones.
73When the PC is teleported, they cannot take any gear (clothing and equipment) with them.
74When it’s cold, the PC can cut glass with their nipples.
75PC’s presence makes jumping carp violent.
76Fireflies swarm the PC at night, and does not gain bonus for hiding in darkness. (No penalties either)
77PC cannot enter a room without announcing their presence
78PC remembers the night a wizard plucked them from the pumpkin patch, and turned them into what they are now.
79PC becomes soluble in rainfall. (Drinking liquids is harmless)
80PC now owes their life to someone who won’t be born for centuries.
81PC sprouts a 3 ft prehensile monkey tail.
82PC cannot perform any action without announcing their name.
83PC does not age while asleep. Increase lifespan by 1/3.
84PC teleports 1 mile; stone replica appears in his place.
85Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
86PC's clothes change randomly when attacked. (Armour is not affected)
87PC's breath becomes combustible.
88Last creature killed by PC is reanimated, and hunts the PC.
89PC becomes aware that at death, they are resurrected with opposite alignment.
90PC becomes very talented at making whittled spoons.
91PC realizes that the universe was born in a huge explosion. Is allowed to start religion.
92PC can juggle anything they can lift.
93PC becomes addicted to casting the last spell they casted, and really enjoys casting it whenever they get the chance, or an excuse.
94PC cannot enter a building without being invited.
95Deludes PC into believing the grog functions as indicated by a second die roll (no save).
96PC no longer has muscles. (But can do everything without them.)
97Everyday when the PC enters combat, PC's sweat becomes a minor water elemental. 3d6 rounds, 50% chance of being hostile. Dissipates at midnight.
98Any liquid consumed now produces the effect of the grog to the PC.
99PC violently erupts into flames, burning off all of the hair on their body. Any hair that grows back is now fireproof.
100PC suddenly recalls a past life where they were a destitute beggar who died, with no one to miss them.
101PC teleports to where they had visited 24 hours ago.
102PC's touch brings wilting flowers back to life.
103PC can cast Detect Stupid at will. (doing so might only detect the PC)
104PC can become a mount.
105PC becomes a dehydrated water salesmen. (just add water!) (3 sp per can)
106PC grows cat ears, and gains a dislike of water. PC also likes fish.
107Whenever the PC is struck with magic, the surrounding 50 ft area shifts as though it were the opposite time of day. (actual time does not change)
108PC can expel bodily gasses as a free action from the pores of their skin, and conceal themselves within their 5 ft. square. No effect on any adjacent squares.
109PC can explode at will, reducing HP to 0. Explosion deals 1 point of damage per hit point in a 20 ft. area. Each time reduces max HP by 2 and disintegrates any non magical possessions including armour and weapons.
110Roll again, effect can be brewed into a magical potion. (Ingredients are DMs choice)
111Moonlight makes the PC look like a decomposing corpse.
112PC's sneeze is now a strong gust of wind.
113To PC, "Something pulls at your heartstrings, you feel as though you need to give the next person you see all of your money."
114PC's next temporary effect (other than the grog) becomes permanent (and cannot be removed).
115Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
116PC sprouts a singing venus fly trap on their shoulder that sings when the PC is happy.
117If the PC stares at someone, they are unable to look away.
118PC gains a valve that has a coin slot attached to it. The PC can insert the valve anywhere, deposit the number of gp for a grog, and it will dispense it!
119Doors that the PC opens sigh.
120Whenever the PC is affected by any sort of magic, the fabled land-shark learns their current location.
121PC gains memories of a past life of an insanely powerful epic wizard. Specifically when that epic wizard went to the future to (kill, maim, higher, talk to, have fun with, give an item to, warn, perform an action around, or spite) his future life (the PC) the next day.
122A women walks up to the PC, and proclaims that she is the PC's wife. (Children at DM's discretion.)
123Whenever the PC sings, a wave expels out and fills the immediate 10 ft area with blossoming flowers, regardless of the PC's singing ability.
124PC agrees with everything, even if it doesn't make sense, or is contradictory. PC’s personal beliefs are unaffected.
125PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
126The PC slowly, painlessly, and inconveniently turns to stone from the fingers and toes inwards. 1 limb per minute turn to stone. Can be removed by a remove curse. (Or reversed with a stone to flesh.)
127The PC suddenly becomes aware of a nearby dragon treasure horde, the only problem is that the dragon knows that the PC knows.
128PC gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
129PC gains another personality that presents itself when the PC sleeps. (roll for alignment of other personality.)
130Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the affect.
131PC becomes a were-farmer.
132PC grows a beard, 2 ft long, permanent. If it's removed in anyway, it grows back overnight.
133PC naturally attracts bears, 60% chance of being friendly, but will not fight for him.
134PC attracts floating animated hands. (Tend to steal possessions and hold them)
135PC gains a halo, and will be revealed with a detect good spell, regardless of alignment or true nature.
136PC attracts the undead and it's necromancers, friendly or not. (Usually not)
137PC becomes an animated object version of themselves. (Takes damage normally)
138PC suddenly remembers where they had buried their treasure chest full of doubloons.
139PC realizes the exact location of a particular flower that becomes the PC's newest obsession. (The flower can be magical or not.)
140PC’s body becomes a medium sized infernal imp. (no stat or alignment change)
141PC cries at the sight of flying birds, because it's such a beautiful metaphor for their soul.
142PC loses all sexual characteristics of their race.
143Whenever the PC is alone, they painfully transform into an strange bird-like thing. The PC instantaneously reverts to normal if another person or creature goes near them or sees them.
144PC slowly remembers their time at war each night, and is forthcoming about telling old war stories at the campfire.
145PC’s esophagus can function as a scabbard that wouldn’t prevent movement, eating, talking, or breathing.
146PC's mouth becomes a set of 4 tentacles 2 ft long.
147PC has an intense need to narrate his actions/feelings and surroundings.
148PC can communicate feelings through physical contact.
149PC becomes a compulsive skinny dipper. Any water they swim in is treated as holy. (or evil, depending on alignment)
150PC’s dreams are replaced with visions of killing someone they haven’t met yet.
151PC becomes aware of a mundane object of his choice, and will only ever be comfortable with the object being around.
152Whenever the PC falls more than 20 ft. they make a 6 foot whole in the ground in the shape of their body when they land. Falling damage applies normally.
153Whenever the PC hears the laughter of children, they painfully transform into a troll, and revert when they’re struck.
154PC knows the birthday of anyone they touch.
155PC is haunted by the ghost of their childhood Saber Toothed Lolrus.
156Roses replace the PC's hair. They grow at the normal rate of hair, and blossom when in season, giving the PC a temporary +1 to CHA.
157Any fires set by the PC attract the undead like moths to a flame, whether they're friendly or not. (10% of being friendly)
158PC grows a hairy tail, 3 ft long. Objects smaller than the PC’s hand can be stored in the tail.
159PC appears to be an old black and white cartoon.
160Roll again, and the PC remembers that they’ve had the effect the whole time.
161PC experiences acute paranoia whenever they hear their name.
162Whenever someone first strikes the PC, both them and the attacker rotate 180 degrees in the direction they’re facing, and are both considered flat-footed the first time it happens.
163PC finds a kitten in their pocket. The PC falls instantly in love with the kitten as though under a charm effect, no saves. Anyone who sees the kitten is distracted for 1d4 rounds, even if they've seen the kitten before. Afterwards, they make a DC 13 fortitude save or be distracted for another 1d4 rounds.
164PC has eyes in the back of their head. Can only use one of their pairs of their eyes at a time.
165PC apologizes profusely every time they attack and/or kill something. Will otherwise feel the same way about fighting as before the effect.
166PC gains lycanthropy. (Were-wolf)
167For the next 1d6 weeks, every time the PC removes any head gear, a large white rabbit appears from underneath it. It is a normal rabbit. 01-50% Male, 51-100% Female. They will mate and produce offspring normally.
168PC lays an egg (regardless of sex). (What kind is DMs choice.)
169PC's only mode of transportation is the moon walk.
170PC learns to understand the next language they hear that they don’t currently know.
171PC becomes severely prejudice against kobolds.
172PC gains a birthmark of nobility from a distant or made up country.
173PC naturally attracts dire animals (DMs choice each time.) 50% of being friendly.
174PC doesn’t stick to spider’s web. They can attempt to pluck spider’s webs.
175PC can mesmerize non-magical animals they can see by dancing.
176PC's mouth no longer opens when they talk, but words and sounds still come out as normal.
177PC becomes addicted to the last substance they consumed before the grog.
178PC remembers the night a wizard killed them. It’s a little fuzzy why and how they’re alive now.
179PC compulsively swears whenever they pay anyone or anything a compliment.
180PC realizes they’re an escaped slave whose owner is tracking them.
181PC is transformed into one the last surviving member of an endangered species. (That strangely enough has the exact same characteristics as the race they were beforehand, other than appearance)
182PC hears 1d4 voices in their head from now on.
183PC grows another set of arms just beneath their normal ones.
184PC does not have a reflection.
185Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
186A hat appears on the PC's head. If it is removed, another hat appears under it. There can never be a point where the PC is not wearing a hat. Each hat can be sold for 3 cp.
187PC's finger nails dispense magical ink, and can be used to scribe spells with.
188Roll 1d12, at that time of day, the PC emits a powerful beam of light that has no effect other than alerting absolutely everything that can see it to your presence at that moment.
189PC gains a D20 of Destiny, which the PC can consult at-will in-game.
190PC becomes very talented at tomfoolery.
191PC is able to summon an extra-dimensional kitchen to prepare any type of fancy food they want.
192PC can balance on anything when they are completely naked. If touched with anything (including rain) the effect is negated.
193Any object that's less than 1 pound within 10 ft of the PC begins to orbit around them. When the PC moves more than 10 ft away from the original spot of the object, they stop and return to where they were.
194PC hiccups butterflies. 2d4 butterflies per round for 2d4 rounds when caught flat-footed (or surprised).
195The PC’s feet cannot smell, and gets occasionally complimented for it regardless of the situation. NPCs are unaware of any compliments they give.
196PC is able to kill stones with birds.
197Any food the PC cooks is able to speak.
198Any liquid consumed now produces the effect of the grog to the PC.
199PC's brain is bombarded by stupidity. After 1d2 days of recovery, they can tell terrible jokes as a swift action, and causes sentient creatures to make a DC 17 will save or be stuck 1d4/level rounds pondering how dumb it is. Creatures are considered staggered.
200PC suddenly recalls all of the circus training they received as a circus elephant in a past life.
201Everytime PC snaps their fingers, a biscuit appears before them. It's a normal biscuit. Max 1d4/lvl biscuits per day.
202PC grows an afro that can be used as a backpack.
203PC cannot become non-magically dirty.
204PC's presence boils any kind of eggs if within 30 ft, no matter what. (stay away from hens)
205PC's hands and forearms are immune to acid.
206PC can make a DC 23 will save to grow mustache out of sheer force of will.
207PC's neck, arms, and legs become incorporeal, but their head, hands, feet and body do not.
208PC becomes easily mistakable for a regional political revolutionary.
209PC no longer has weight. Automatically fails bull rush and trip saves. Is otherwise unaffected. (i.e. falling damage, load carried.)
210Roll again, effect can be synthesized into a poison. (Ingredients are DMs choice)
211Next profanity used by PC becomes a living, vile entity.
212PC believes anything shiny can be used as money.
213PC's skull becomes diamond. (does not affect their ability to live or grow)
214PC is allergic to magical creatures.
215Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
216PC's skin is burned by moonlight. 1d4 dmg/round
217PC naturally attracts deinonychus' (raptors). 40% chance of being hungry.
218PC is always right about the best choice for the interior decor of any room.
219PC cannot be killed with rope.
220Any casted magic that affects the PC causes an extremely blasphemous tattoo to appear.
221PC's soul can leave their body and haunt any inanimate objects (weapons, lamps), but is fatigued when they return to their body.
222PC is nourished by grass instead of food. (All other foods make them vomit.)
223With exception to the eyes and brain, the PC begins to harmlessly decompose. (Is not undead, no longer eats)
224PC can shoot any thin elongated object as arrows. PC takes a -4 to attack bonus when using them.
225PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
226PC’s body parts are replaced with fake ones. (PC has an urge to go find their original body)
227PC can summon the undead. 40% chance of controlling it. Anything summoned disappears at midnight.
228PC receives a participation trophy, with “You Tried” engraved on it.
229PC's heart becomes clockwork. It must be wound every 24 hours or else it stops. If it stops, PC's hit points drop to -1, and are restored to full if it's rewound. PC's eyes become removable pearls, retain normal sight.
230Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the affect.
231PC's hair becomes a very large powdered white wig. PC also gains a gavel.
232PC teleports 1d20 years into the past, in the same spot. The same amount of years later, they walk into the bar and watch themselves disappear.
233PC enjoys a good game of chess with only mirrors as his opponent.
234Everyone no longer can take the PC seriously.
235The only male name the PC is able to pronounce is Gary.
236PC's touch can drain 1d8 hit points, but is drained the same amount.
237PC is awake and alert the instant they wake up, regardless of how many hours they slept. Can also never be hungover.
238PC suddenly remembers they really, REALLY needed to do something, but for the life of them cannot remember what it was.
239PC now tends to distantly stare at other PC's unmentionables quite blatantly.
240PC’s body becomes a panda. (no stat change)
241PC is compelled to devour kobolds on sight.
242PC constantly sounds like a grandma, using the terms "pooky" and "schnookums" regardless of the situation. PC pinches cheeks too.
243Once per day, the PC can transform a segment of wall into a door.
244Within 5 ft of the PC is always 10 degrees colder.
245PC is now continuously tempted by demons in their sleep.
246PC will become addicted to the next substance they consume.
247PC becomes a were-saxophone player.
248PC gains devil horns, and will be revealed with a detect evil spell, regardless of alignment or true nature.
249PC gains fangs, but not a bite attack. Meat is more enjoyable now.
250PC’s dreams are replaced with visions of being a hunted animal running from poachers.
251PC gains a pet rock familiar.
252PC can speak with plants once per week. (equivalent to succeeding a Gather Information or Knowledge nature of 15 DC)
253PC's hands double in size, and can use weapons one size category larger than the PC with no penalties.
254PC becomes extremely trusting of a random base race.
255PC learns to brew diet healing potions. (Does not actually heal)
256PC's backpack disappears, and can just pull out items from behind their back, as long as they can carry it.
257PC can use and throw vegetables to cast bolts of magic missile. Each vegetable is one bolt. (treated as spell, not thrown object)
258PC switches eyes with the next creature with eyes they come into contact with. (Eyes will shrink/grow proportionally for all involved)
259PC grows a second head that has a separate personality.
260Any meal prepared by the PCs result in a gourmet lobster meal that, although looks delicious, doesn’t taste very good. (Regardless of the ingredients used)
261PC can not exist any further away than 50 ft. of a random party member.
262People with magic naturally distrust the PC.
263PC's bones become unbreakable. But will take damage normally.
264Whenever the PC receives a critical with a weapon, the weapon breaks. (after taking damage)
265PC's jaw splits in two, but can talk normally.
266PC is only seen as a silhouette.
267Every hour, PC has a 30% chance of falling asleep. PC can be woken up normally, or will otherwise sleep for 8 hours.
268PC lays an egg (regardless of species). (What kind is DMs choice.)
269When the PC leaves the ground, they become twice as heavy. (Take twice as much fall damage)
270PC learns to understand the next language they hear that they don’t currently know.
271PC's palms and fingers become immune to fire.
272It rains outdoors whenever the PC is sad.
273PC can use their index finger, and middle finger as a functional pair of scissors.
274PC is able to get reliable directions from snails. (They speak very quietly though.)
275Any number of hands will sprout from the PC’s body as long as there is another hand left to shake, shoulder to pat, etc.
276If an insect comes in contact with a PC, it's size becomes the same size category of the PC, and it becomes dire.
277The PC's eyes move together to become one big eye.
278PC remembers the night a wizard knocked them out, and turned them into a beautiful mermaid. It’s still fuzzy how they got to be what they are now.
279PC gains a Tortoise mount.
280PC recently took an inviolable vow but can’t quite remember it. (DMs choice)
281PC becomes a were-human. (even if they're human, they turn into a different human)
282PC comes down with a nasty infection from the Solanum disease. (Zombies!)
2832d8 of PC's teeth turn to gold. Can be sold 2 gp each. (but must yank them out first)
284PC believes everyone is an imposter of themselves.
285Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
286Everything in the world becomes aware of who the PC is.
287PC gains a prehensile tongue that can extend out 5 ft.
288PC develops an intense fear of trees; they might be treants.
289PC can run up walls and other flat surfaces, but if they stop or change direction, they will fall.
290PC has a remarkable knack for teaching monkeys sign language.
291PC can use their own hands like a musical instrument. (Sounds a bit like a piano)
292Anything the PC pees on will forcibly align itself to magnetic north.
293PC will now make up any excuse to fuel their newfound collection of tiny animal figurines.
294PC can summon doors that when opened, lead to a random plane. They, however, cannot summon the doors when in a plane other than the material plane.
295At the start of every encounter the PC must declare whether or not they are willing to kill anyone.
296PC's bones can be played like a xylophone.
297Relatively shallow bodies of water split in a dry path whenever the PC walks through them.
298PC enjoys a good meal of brains. They also gain very small memories from the brains they consume, and can make a Knowledge brains check (+10 normal DC) instead of any normal knowledge check.
299PC's personal space collapses in on itself and implodes around the PC. After 1d3 days of recovery, the PC can no longer be crushed by any circumstance.
300PC suddenly recalls a past life where they were a wizard’s familiar.
301PC gives birth to a clutch of (DMs choice).
302PC can increase the length of any hair by pulling on it.
303PC becomes the central deity of a religious cult and gains followers. The cult can be based on anything the PC desires, (I.e. adventure, treasure, muffins...etc.)
304PC is only nourished by alcohol. (All other foods make them vomit. Will become drunk as normal.)
305PC's belly button can open to a 1 cubic foot pouch of holding.
306PC's breath is always a visible smoke. (can fill a room over time)
307PC can spend a full round action to succeed a DC 25 + HD of creature concentration check, to knock out one enemy.
308PC is invincible to all magic, but only while asleep.
309PC irrationally hates fungi. (stomps on them when they see them)
310Roll again, effect can be alchemized into a salve. (Ingredients are DMs choice)
311PC is knocked prone whenever they hear their name.
312A doppelganger of the PC is instantly created 5 ft away from them. The creature pays its humble respect and wanders off to see the world.
313Any shadow puppet the PC makes becomes a harmless living shadow of whatever it was.
314Whatever the PC says appears in words that float around their head for a little while.
315Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
316PC loses 50 lbs.
317PC can no longer answer a question truthfully.
318PC will never remember their name.
319PC’s pockets are now popular hangout spots for pocket gnomes.
320Any casted magic that affects the PC causes birds to swoop down and groom them. (Like a crocodile)
321PC's internal organs implode and compress into one super organ. PC looks only like skin and bones now. (is otherwise unaffected.)
322PC shoots out fireworks (works as dancing lights) whenever they're struck.
323PC gains a small doom cloud familiar.
324PC's blood becomes a nutritious snack for anyone lucky enough to taste it.
325PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
326PC will now age backwards. (from how old they are now.)
327PC can no longer see a random party member
328PC's hair stands straight up as if electrically charged. It frizzes and discharges electricity. PC's handshake is shocking and static electricity sparks appear on the PC's body now and then. (Harmless, but can get annoying to be around.)
329PC can’t help but smile and giggle quietly to themselves at the misfortune of others.
330Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the affect.
331PC becomes irrationally prejudice of a random base race.
332PC and someone who looks exactly like the PC are suddenly aware of each other.
333During a full moon, the PC is accosted by undead tax collectors until dawn.
334Whenever the PC witnesses a crime, they are compelled to intervene. (Whether or not it's to bring the criminal to justice is up to them.)
335Within 5 ft of the PC is always 10 degrees hotter.
336PC's whistling attracts birds en masse.
337PC's left palm is considered a holy weapon, while they PC's right palm is considered an unholy weapon.
338PC finally remembers which one of their teeth was fake, and could be removed and opened to access a modest reserve of highly corrosive acid.
339PC cannot be killed by holy weapons.
340PC’s body becomes a kangaroo. (no stat change)
341PC has a grapevine constantly growing on them.
342PC’s eyes can function like laser pointers.
343PC is permanently dressed in a pristine Tuxedo. (Can wear armor over it)
344PC's blood becomes a flourescent light blue, and glows in the dark.
345Powerful spirits instruct the PC how to cook nice dinners in their sleep. It never turns out the same way when they try.
346PC can fly by sticking their thumbs in their armpits and flapping very hard.
347Everyone who first meets the PC says, “I’m so sorry” in a very concerned tone, although is not aware of saying it.
348PC is no longer liked, nor hated by anyone. (a reset)
349PC photographically remembers a map that leads to a questionably powerful artifact, with landmarks that may not exist in this realm.
350PC’s dreams are replaced with visions of being a wizard on the run from authorities, having discovered a terrible secret.
351PC's ghost is always viewing the PC's own actions in the third person.
352PC becomes a very dedicated carnivore. (Enemies look tasty)
353PC can use brooms to fly. (poor)
354PC is now affected by magnets. They are not themselves magnetic.
355Whenever a ranged attack misses the PC, it is considered they caught it with their teeth.
356Whenever the PC hears their name, they are briefly struck by inexplicable terror.
357PC can breathe in outer space.
358Roll a 1d12, at that time every 24 hours (pm), the PC is struck by lightning. (if outside. 1d6 damage to PC, 4d6 damage to anyone within 5ft)
359PC is able to sit on anyone’s head as long as the head is bald. (PC becomes as light as paper when doing so)
360PC will have dull pains on their body where ever they have struck killing blows to other creatures that go away after an extended rest. (Splitting headaches for splitting heads, stomach aches for stomach wounds)
361PC's hair becomes a mohawk that’s as hard as steel.
362PC's random body part becomes invincible. (Arms, teeth, etc; DMs choice.)
363PC can only be healthy via cannibalism. (Maybe even a civil one.)
364PC gets an amoeba familiar. (Will not multiply.)
365PC evaporates water when they touch it.
366A permanent image of the PC is left where they are standing right now.
367PC is afflicted with Porphyric Hemophelia. (Vampirism.)
368PC lays an egg (regardless of sex). (What kind is DMs choice.)
369If the PC pours water on the ground, it will become quicksand.
370PC learns to understand the next language they hear that they don’t currently know.
371PC sinks in ice as if it was quicksand.
372Whenever the PC enters a building, gravity immediately reverses orientation for them.
373PC's teeth become precious gems, and cannot be removed while the PC is alive.
374PC only cries blood. (Harmless)
375PC can bring down holy judgement on small spiders.
376PC does not have to touch objects to pick them up, but they must be in reach.
377PC can cure any mundane illness they’re afflicted with by taking a bath.
378PC remembers the night a wizard knocked them out, stole their gold, and forced them to eat their own shoes.
379PC only bleeds rainbows.
380PC sprouts a small, flaming wick atop of their head that can’t be put out. It burns brighter when they’re angry.
381PC constantly hears the playing of a guitar in the distance. (and could be drawn to it)
382If the PC is planted, they will grow into a tree that bears small fetus fruits that mature into babies of clones of the PC.
383A random party member becomes infatuated with the PC.
384PC grows a small leopard-print fuzz on their body.
385Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
386PC can scry using a bald scalp.
387Whenever the PC is struck in combat, the weapon they were hit with combusts, dealing 1d4 force damage to anyone in 5 ft. and 1 point of continual fire damage for 1d4 rounds. The weapon does not break.
388PC's skin gains full body leopard print tattoos.
389PC suddenly realizes that they've actually been the person sitting next to them the whole time. The other person, embarrassed by this, offers to swap all their equipment and clothing.
390PC has a license for wild-geese chasing. (Ever been on a wild-goose chase?)
391PC loses their name, the party gives PC a new one. NPCs forget the old name and only know the new.
392PC has an extreme distaste for thieves and pirates.
393The grog pours out of the PC's mouth back into the mug, refusing to be drank by the PC. (needs new potion)
394PC's hair grows to touch the ground, and can be used as an arm.
395PC is pulled into the earth where they were standing until only their head shows, and must be dug up.
396PC does not sink in water.
397PC's hair bears fruit during harvest season.
398PC can become gaseous in direct sunlight. (Equipment can't)
399PC's internal organs become extremely unstable and explode. After 1d4 days of recovery, PC moves past the need for their organs.
400PC suddenly recalls a past life that was fairly normal until it ended abruptly as a sacrifice to a dark god. (It must not have worked, so the cult might try again.)
401PC's eyes become removable pearls, retain normal sight.
402PC is no longer able to sit or lay down.
403PC can swim up waterfalls.
404PC can inscribe markings into stone with their fingers.
405PC is poisoned. (DMs choice of poison)
406PC's eye sockets become pitch black. PC can see normally.
407Any facial hair the PC has becomes self-aware.
408PC can animate their own shoes to dance, but not while they're being worn.
409Any water drank by the PC is instantly purified.
410Roll again, PC becomes sick and the next effect becomes the main symptom. (DM may add any other symptoms as they like. 30% contagious to anyone who spends a day around the PC)
411PC becomes best friends with the current president of the United States.
412PC ages 100 years, and has 100 years added on to their natural life span.
413PC can walk on clouds. (Getting to them is a different problem)
414PC becomes unsure if they exist, often asking people if they really know who they are.
415Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
416PC gains a second personality. They can sort themselves out as they see fit.
417PC's body is covered with fire like an everburning torch. (No harm to PC)
418PC gains a voodoo doll of them self.
419PC realizes they have died centuries ago, and doesn’t know how they’re here now.
420Any casted magic that affects the PC causes a random limb to fall off. (Can be re-attached easily)
421PC turns to stone for 1d4 hours whenever someone makes eye contact with them.
422PC gains a permanent twitch.
423When PC walks over a spot where someone died, they instantly know where it was.
424The next thing the PC sits on will be able to fly. (poor)
425PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
426PC can always cast the last spell that was cast upon them.
427PC's mouth can open to twice it's normal size.
428PC forgets their childhood, but would still recognize anyone important from it if they see them.
429PC can turn whatever they kill into small fist sized trophies.
430Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the effect.
431Whenever the PC falls they will always land on their face. (This includes jumping)
432PC's hair becomes a hedgehog familiar. Hair grows back at normal rate.
433When the PC's blood leaves the PC, it floats around like wax inside a lava lamp.
434PC turns invisible when eyes are closed. Does not affect clothing.
435PC no longer has a face, but can talk, eat, see, hear, and smell normally.
436Any animal the PC touches gains human-like intellect and speech as long as they're in contact.
437PC's feet become as flexible as hands. (+5 to climb when barefoot)
438Burning hot coals do not burn the inside of the PC's mouth or hands, and are actually quite the tasty snack.
439Whenever the PC takes damage, confetti erupts from their wound making a buzzing noise.
440PC's body becomes a gorilla. (no stat change)
441As long as the PC lives, a far off demon lord cannot return to life. (might be attacked by demon minions!)
442PC knows how wise any creature they encounter is.
443Any liquid the PC consumes becomes alcoholic. PC is also more immune to dehydration than most.
444PC's skeleton removes itself from the PC's body without killing them, and runs away. It takes 24 hours for a new one to grow back. The skeleton is the same alignment as the PC, but has no desire to become friends with them.
445PC is lectured by angelic figures in decency every night in their sleep.
446PC's skeleton glows a fluorescent red that's visible through their skin.
447PC cannot see the undead.
448PC moves and falls normally underwater, but only if completely submerged. (PC will still have to hold their breath.)
449PC's skin becomes soot black.
450PC's dreams are replaced with visions of being a beautiful mermaid viciously devouring the bodies of sailors.
451PC gains an aura of disagreement.
452PC can impregnate any species. The offspring will be the impregnated species.
453PC becomes a casual acquaintance with with a death god, and occasionally bumps into the god while they're on the job.
454Fruit sings if within 30 ft of the PC.
455Whenever a PC enters a building for the first time, it will eject them forcefully.
456PC becomes a were-tree.
457PC is able to spell and scribe any word they hear in any alphabet. (Whether they understand it or not is a different matter)
458PC can summon pillows at will, and they are extra fluffy. PC can summon at max one pillow per person in their party.
459PC can stop erupting volcanoes by pressing a finger to their mouth and shushing it.
460PC is now a particularly enjoyable stalking target for invisible stalkers. However, harming the PC would ruin the sport.
461Whenever the PC closes their eyes, they see the place where they used to live. It would be a shame if it burned down or something....hehehe...
462PC can move statues as though they were opposable.
463PC loses all hair on their body.
464PC can read books by flipping through them quickly.
465PC is burned by coming in contact with musical instruments.
466Whatever the PC touches has to agree with them, but can still physically resist them.
467PC is only nourished by the souls of who they slay. (All other foods make them vomit.)
468PC switches minds with the nearest dog.
469PC tastes like chocolate.
470PC learns to understand the next language they hear that they don’t currently know.
471Any plant the PC plants will grow in one day, but will never blossom or bear fruits or vegetables until it normally would anyway.
472PC attracts kobolds.
473PC learns one mundane song that they can play on any instrument.
474Fires whisper sweet nothings to the PC, encouraging them to succeed.
475Ethereal strings appear to be attached to the PC’s limbs and head, that extend upwards for a foot before trailing off.
476PC can no longer use outhouses to go to the bathroom.
477PC's soul cannot leave the material plane.
478PC remembers the night a wizard knocked them out, and stole their heart and lungs. (They’ve been replaced with magical wooden replicas)
479PC's tears are acidic. The PC is not burned by them.
480PC suffers intense pain whenever they enter a temple or church, regardless of the deity.
481PC will possess whatever kills them for 1d8+lvl days.
482The next enemy the PC meets will become friendly, but only to the PC.
483Every fruit the PC touches turns to glass.
484PC now has commitment issues. If they already had them before, they’re now more secure in their relationships.
485Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
486PC will win every coin flip they do.
487PC can bring anything they've killed back to life. It will become permanently hostile to the PC regardless. (PC cannot gain experience this way)
488Any creature the PC kills evaporates. (Not equipment)
489Any change in HP of the PC floats away as numbers when it happens.
490PC is a champion pillow fighter. (but only with pillows)
491PC's urine can revive plant life.
492The PC is now burned by cold, and frostbitten by fire.
493PC now has an exceptional talent for making appropriately sized hats for small sized category animals or smaller.
494PC realizes they are an immortal soul inhabiting a temporary meat vessel that is slowly dying. What's worse is that they know nothing awaits them specifically after their body dies.
495PC can crack open any kind of nut or seed in their hand.
496PC's fingers grow twice as long.
497By rubbing their hands together fast enough, the PC can generate enough sparks to start a campfire.
498PC's hair becomes porcupine quills.
499PC seizes violently, becoming painfully statically charged. After 1d4 days of recovery, PC becomes a sustainable power source for any electrical equipment, regardless of if there is any.
500PC suddenly remembers a past life where they were a flightless bird that was experimented on, and criticized everything the experimenters did.
501PC gives birth to a brood of (DMs choice).
502PC glows a shade of gold in the presence of magic, and magical ore.
503PC eyes never close.
504PC can use carrots as daggers.
505PC's tongue becomes a harmless snake, and talk normally.
506PC's urine is extremely acidic. (does not harm PC)
507PC falls in love with the next enemy they see. (DMs choice if it is requited)
508Everytime the PC whistles, an eagle will swoop down and land on the PC's shoulder, and stare at whatever the PC stares at. It leaves if the PC enters combat.
509PC believes the next humanoid they see is their son and/or daughter and/or other.
510Roll again, effect can be transmitted through bodily fluids. (Urine, saliva, blood…)
511PC gains a political committee designed to elect the PC to a fictional political office.
512PC's skin turns red when it's hot, and blue when it's cold.
513PC is haunted by the ghost of everything they slay.
514It is always assumed that the PC killed their parents. (Whether or not it's true)
515Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
516PC's pockets has an unending supply of Cuban cigars. Cannot be sold. (Only given away graciously)
517PC is only able to enter rooms through dramatic actions.
518PC attracts insects of any size.
519PC always appears to be riddled with bullet holes. (Does not bleed from holes)
520Any casted magic that affects the PC causes an anvil to chain itself to the PC’s leg. (Break DC 17)
521The next wild mundane animal the PC sees, becomes domesticated to the PC.
522PC gains the profession Air Guitar skill. By strumming the air, the noises of a guitar are created. PC may attempt to dazzle and stun anyone within range of his voice with a wicked guitar solo as a full round action. Fortitude save DC 10 + PC's Air Guitar skill bonus.
523PC can no longer understand their racial language.
524PC's presence causes frost to form, but won't freeze anything.
525Scarecrows become the PC's worst nightmare.
526PC gains a new hairstyle every day.
527PC becomes attracted to themself.
528PC grows fur on their entire body.
529PC glows an eerie green for 3 seconds when their bellybuttons are pressed.
530Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the effect.
531PC can only communicate by saying their name over and over, and the party are the only ones who understand them. This includes past and future party members.
532No matter what the PC says, anyone who hears them will think they are attempting to seduce them.
533PC becomes intensely afraid of prostitutes.
534Whenever the PC witnesses a spell being cast, they are compelled to rate it on a scale of 1-10.
535PC becomes extremely flexible, to an inhuman point.
536PC gains a 6th finger on their left hand.
537PC can use weapons as musical instruments.
538PC will always land on their feet. Always.
539Doors attack the PC if they attempt to walk through them. (Wood: +3 1d6+2 smash attack. Metal: +3 2d6+3 smash attack. Stone: +2 2d8+4 smash attack.)
540PC's head becomes that of a velociraptor. (gains bite attack)
541PC has a powerful urge to punt anything in the tiny size category or smaller.
542PC gains opposable feet.
543PC's sweat releases an eerie blue smoke.
544PC's eyes become similar to an octopus, and can see underwater perfectly for 60 ft.
545PC makes their own god up and worships it. (It also exists due to it being worshiped.)
546PC’s pupils look like galaxies, with infinite detail.
547PC is no longer able to reproduce in any way.
548PC becomes a permanent magnet for magical items. Getting close to a magical item causes it to quickly move towards the PC (or the PC to the item if the item cannot move) and activate it's effect once it hits, automatically attuning to the PC if possible. (Reflex DC 15 to avoid activating the item)
549PC's nose glows blue when they pass near underground wells of water.
550PC's dreams are replaced with visions of being a virtuous ascetic nurse taking loving care of the sick, eventually dying of the sickness themselves.
551PC has a 10% chance of impregnating any creature with a normal grapple.
552PC becomes obsessively hygienic.
553PC can digest bones.
554PC grows animal horns. (DMs choice of moose, rams, etc.)
555Any mount ridden by the PC suffers no fatigue while they ride it.
556PC gains own shadow as familiar. (see shadow monster)
557PC becomes chronically pooped on by anything that flies.
558PC's nails fall off, and can be planted to grow any type of flower the PC wants. (Instantly)
559PC can shoot spider webs out from their fingertips when outside of combat.
560PC gains an excessively dramatic scar on their face.
561PC gains a permanent pair of glasses.
562PC can remove any curse, by only receiving it them self.
563PC can melt non-magical ice with their touch. They do not give off any extra heat.
564All liquids the PC consumes become caffeinated.
565PC can make a DC 15 Concentration check to summon the nearest bird, friendly or not.
566PC's feet becomes invincible, but they can still feel pain.
567PC becomes physically attracted to weapons.
568PC's clothing and armor permanently merges with their body and can no longer be removed by any means. It is considered part of the PC's body for all purposes, but still provides all of its original effects.
569PC becomes feral when their food is at stake.
570PC learns to understand the next language they hear that they don’t currently know.
571PC gains antennae on their head.
572When the PC is drunk, they can succeed a DC 17 fortitude save to release a stream of fire with a mighty burp. 10 ft line, 1d4 fire damage.
573PC becomes physically attracted to mundane animals.
574PC can make snowballs out of water.
575PC always wins at Rock, Paper, Scissors.
576PC is physically teleported to alternate planes in their sleep, but return to the material plane when they wake up.
577PC harbors an extreme distaste for sailors.
578PC remembers the night a wizard knocked them out, and stole their family’s magical sword heirloom.
579PC's voice of reason becomes an invincible squirrel that no one else can see.
580PC grows a ponytail of feathers all the colour of the rainbow. It makes for wonderful plumage.
581A bright round sphere looking object appears over the PC's head whenever they get an idea, or remember something.
582The next enemy the PC meets becomes directly related to the PC, 40% chance of being friendly.
583The entire party is pulled into the PC's dreams whenever the PC is asleep.
584PC's hair becomes smoke.
585Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
586PC's hair becomes a chicken that insists on sitting on their head. The chicken is immune to damage, and does not leave the PC's head.
587Whenever it rains, the PC is always at the end of the rainbow.
588PC can only communicate with cat noises. (PC can talk normally to any feline)
589PC mistakes every woman they meet for the first time as their farming wife Charlotte.
590PC is able to dig graves with surprising amounts of gusto.
591PC can make a DC 15 Concentration check to summon the nearest bird, friendly or not.
592The PC's evil twin from a parallel dimension materializes next to them.
593PC gains a gambling addiction, and has magically bad luck.
594Every night, an intelligent woodchuck appears to tell the PC stories as they fall asleep.
595PC can use arrows without a bow. Instead they throw them. Use the stats of a short bow.
596Vines grow over the PC whenever they're asleep.
597PC permanently smells like a fresh ocean breeze. People might reminisce about their romantic experiences on beaches or boats.
598PC's head becomes invisible.
599A Boeing 747 commercial airliner crashes nearby. (DMs Choice as to what the plane's cargo was.)
600PC suddenly recalls a past life where they were an animal being worshiped in ancient times.
601Only the top half of the PC is visible.
602PC's touch leaves permanent black marks on any type of skin, except for their own. They also become great skin artists.
603PC can grow herbs on themselves harmlessly.
604Once per day, the PC can grant one mundane animal an INT score equal to their own, that goes away at midnight.
605PC's hair grows 3x quicker now.
606PC's fingers become a key ingredient to making a brew that can cure any and all diseases and poisons, magical or otherwise. PC is aware of the recipe. 1 finger per brew.
607PC grows 1d4 extra fingers on both of their hands.
608PC becomes extraordinarily attractive to trees.
609PC can swap places with one party member at-will.
610Roll again, PC gains the ability to cook the effect into a meal. (Ingredients are DMs choice)
611PC finds a dagger in their boot. (A +1 Dagger of Substantial Importance!)
612PC can only pee upon other people's legs.
613The next enemy the PC attacks becomes their reoccurring arch enemy that will plot dastardly schemes to destroy the PC and take over the world!
614PC's belly button can open to a 1 cubic foot pouch of holding.
615Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
616PC learns the spell Teach Esperanto, which will automatically teach Esperanto to the subject. Can cast at-will.
617PC gains an un-summonable glacier familiar.
618Next profanity used by PC becomes a living, vile entity.
619Any mundane creature the PC hugs becomes a plush doll version of itself for the duration the PC hugging it. (the animal cannot be harmed while plush)
620Any casted magic that affects the PC causes it to snow in the immediate area.
621Whatever the PC kills harmlessly explodes and splatters everywhere. (People, doors, etc.)
622Whenever the PC wakes up, they are in a coffin where they had went to sleep.
623The PC can only speak in their base language backwards.
624PC gets strange blisters that pop like bubble wrap on their arms. When they pop, they make different musical notes. They're not unsightly, just weird.
625PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
626PC's joints are reversible.
627PC's hands can be unscrewed from their wrists.
628PC can remember their name, and that's about it.
629PC becomes a witch, and might encounter witch hunters.
630Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the effect.
631PC can use fruits as musical instruments.
632PC's hair turns white in the presence of magic. (If it's white to begin with, it turns a girly pink, complete with bows and ribbons.)
633PC's twin shows up, and is similar in every aspect except that their alignment is one step above or below the Characters.
634PC is sexually attracted to fire.
635PC is believed to be a doomsday weapon. (May be sought after by kings and nations.)
636When the PC sleeps, the grass either grows in 160 sq ft area around the PC, or the existing grass grows ten times it's normal size.
637PC's pockets spawn mundane playing cards one at a time.
638PC can cast a random cantrip spell at will.
639PC gains a key that can open their chest cavity harmlessly like a cabinet door.
640PC’s body turns into a troglodyte. (no stat change)
641PC can dance with bears, whether they're hostile or not. PC must make a Wisdom save DC 10 + bear's HD.
642A bottomless well is created next to the PC.
643Whatever object the PC sits on can be piloted. (Fly, 30 ft. poor.)
644When PC touches glass, they move through it like water. (Glass reforms.)
645PC now worships an Egyptian god.
646When the PC snaps, it sounds like a church bell. (As loud as a snap)
647PC gains an aura of incredulity. Everything the PC does seems incredulous.
648PC gains the knowledge of how to weaponize the grog, by imbuing it into a rod of wonder. The effects have a 50% chance of affecting the PC, or the target.
649PC's eyebrows grow twice their size and permanently cover the PC's eyes.
650PC’s dreams are replaced with visions of being an enormous force of pure evil slaughtering innocents.
651Whenever the PC is struck, a mundane creature will appear in their clothing. (rabbits, snakes, birds, etc.)
652PC is detected by Detect Undead.
653PC is constantly mistaken for an extremely evil demon.
654Wildlife brings the PC food periodically.
655PC didn’t actually exist prior to drinking this grog.
656PC's touch leaves permanent red blood splatter.
657PC can hear the thoughts of a random party member.
658PC has random manias of superb mathematical genius, but after 1d4 rounds, won't be able to understand what they had just said or done. During the mania, the PC's brain doubles harmlessly in size.
659PC is a were-construct.
660Magical effects cause the PC to emit the refreshing scent of peppermint.
661PC's weapons are permanently bound to them.
662An owlbear appears, runs toward the PC and hugs them for 1d4 rounds before disappearing. It automatically succeeds on its touch attack and all grapple checks. It attacks anyone who tries to harm the PC it is hugging. This happens at the same time everyday. Even if the bear is in combat, it will still disappear after 1d4 rounds.
663Whenever the PC sleeps, a bed of cabbages grows under them over night.
664It snows whenever the PC is sad.
665When the PC snaps their fingers, a apple appears before them. It's a normal apple. Max 1d4/lvl per day.
666A furious demon portal is opened up directly in front of the PC, and a monster of unspeakable horror named Howard suddenly sparks into existence.
667PC can teleport from the bottom of any freshwater lake to the bottom of any other freshwater lake.
668PC lays an egg (regardless of sex). (What kind is DMs choice.)
669PC's jaw becomes removable.
670PC learns to understand the next language they hear that they don’t currently know.
671PC receives mail from a long distance significant other periodically by Marvin the Mailman. (He's a mailman)
672PC is extremely prejudice against fruits and vegetables.
673PC gains an Easter Island head familiar. When it's summoned, it sits there and creeps everyone out.
674PC can no longer be targeted or affected by the previous spell cast on them.
675PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
676PC can steal one prepared spell from grappled spell casters that doesn't exceed their Int modifier.
677PC's thumb turns greens, and can cause plants to grow at a rapid rate, but cannot exceed their normal size.
678PC remembers the night a wizard knocked them out, and sent back in time from (DMs choice of how far in the future).
679PC can remove their face like a mask.
680PC’s heart will never stop beating, even if removed.
681PC thinks any form of eating meat is a crime against nature.
682PC's mouth is stuck in a permanent smile.
683PC's right arm is interchangeable with any other creature's right arm. (PC can remove right arms harmlessly)
684PC grows an extra finger and toe on each hand and foot. (No effect if PC lacks hands and feet.)
685Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
686PC can speak the language of the next mundane animal they meet.
687PC is able to shove their foot up any butt, regardless if it fits or not. It deals pride damage.
688PC only requires sleep 1d8 hours of sleep a night. (Re-roll every night)
689Anything the PC wears turns to wood permanently, but retains all stats.
690PC has an unusually good talent for trout tickling. (May be illegal in some areas.)
691PC knows the Int score of any creature they encounter.
692PC can use a baguette as a longsword.
693PC becomes addicted to casting the last spell they casted, and really enjoys casting it whenever they get the chance, or an excuse.
694PC is no longer able to get drunk.
695PC physically regresses to when they were a child, but retains all stats and abilities.
696PC can snap their fingers together and produce sparks like flint and steel would.
697PC gains a second heart, and is able to hold their breath for 5-6 minutes before suffocating.
698PC disappears and is replaced with a map to their location.
699PC spontaneously ages 10,000 years. After 1d6 days of recovery, PC is physically otherwise in normal health and stats, but is still 10,000 years older. Lifespan continues as normal.
700PC suddenly recalls a past life where they were a beautiful princess who lived an affluent, and uneventful life.
701PC gives birth to a nest of (DMs choice).
702PC gains insect like wings, and can fly. (poor)
703PC gains 5 ft of height, but is not considered a size category larger. Stats don't change.
704PC believes that all other races other than their own are aliens.
705PC can use and throw fruit to cast bolts of magic missile. Each fruit is one bolt. (treated as spell, not thrown object)
706Whenever the PC goes to the bathroom, small, harmless earthquakes hit the surrounding area.
707Everytime the PC sneezes, an exact duplicate of themselves appears at least 20 ft away from the PC for 1d4 hours. PC must designate a mundane allergen that makes them sneeze. (Certain flowers, dust, mold, animals, etc.)
708PC has a zipper on the front of their chest that they can unzip and show off the inside of their torso.
709The next time the PC dies, they are resurrected as the race that killed them.
710Roll again, effect can be bestowed through a ritual the PC suddenly learns. (Material components are DMs choice)
711PC's shadow smokes as if it's on fire. (Not good to stay in enclosed spaces)
712Any statue resembling an animal that is within 30 ft of the PC is animated. If it goes beyond 30 ft, it ceases to be animated.
713PC can use wildlife as weapons.
714PC harmlessly but constantly bleeds from every orifice they have.
715Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
716PC's voice drops an octave and echoes no matter what.
717PC gains cat pupils, whiskers, and fur. (No low-light vision is gained, PC might tend to purr)
718PC's skin becomes translucent, and observers are able to see tiny fish swimming around inside of the PC.
719PC gains a spirit animal that appears whenever the PC is within 15 ft of fire. (DM’s Choice)
720Any casted magic that affects the PC causes plant life to over grow in the immediate area.
721PC's tears turn into jellybeans.
722All fire that burns within 30 ft. of the PC turns the colour of their choice.
723Any object the PC successfully breaks bursts into flower petals.
724PC gains 100 lbs.
725PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
726PC knows the market value of any humanoid as a slave that they see.
727PC attracts floating candles.
728PC's eyes turn purple and gains an aura of purple. Anyone who is within 5 ft of the PC, including the PC, only sees in shades of purple.
729Everytime the PC attacks a mundane animal, a second one appears next to it.
730Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the effect.
731Any fruit the PC touches becomes dried and preserved.
732PC gains very dramatic looking battle scars that resemble almost every conceivable weapon known.
733PC becomes a ghost when they are in the rain.
734PC learns how to knit. Their knitted products are as tough as leather armor.
735For 1 minute, the PC is flung into a fit of hysteria where they are convinced that they are nothing but constructs in a game played by unseen beings who determine their every move. Afterwards, this experience stays with them forever.
736PC gains 1d4 more eyes.
737A talking rainbow unicorn offers to be the PC's steed. (Unicorn is Neutral Good)
738PC's blood can dissolve metal.
739Whenever the PC is left alone in a building, the building burns down.
740PC’s body turns into a medium-sized praying mantis. (no stat change)
741PC can pick up flames in their hands. (like, scooping up fire and throwing it.)
742When the PC dies, their ghost will haunt the party forever.
743PC gains a pair of sunglasses that when worn, they become "too cool" for whatever action is decided. Does not effect hostilities.
744PC cannot die in their sleep.
745PC is now worshiped by a dying race of frog people.
746PC's hands never leave their sleeves. (PC also permanently wears long sleeve shirts.)
747PC becomes aware of a certain group of people who've managed to travel back in time. (No one in particular, it's DMs choice really)
748With 10 minutes of searching, the PC can find random dinosaur plushies hidden in the environment. They're worthless, but they have strange sentimental value.
749Whatever the PC is sitting on right now becomes their property.
750PC’s dreams are replaced with visions of an ancient temple where a magic artifact is sealed.
751Whenever the PC hears their name, a random flower sprouts somewhere on their person.
752PC's presence causes vegetables within 30 ft. to sing.
753PC gets accepted into the University of their choice.
754PC's left arms swaps with the last humanoid they touched.
755PC finds a compelling but incomprehensible magical tome in their inventory.
756PC has a giant round hole in their chest. (Harmless)
757PC's footsteps sound as though they were 3 size categories larger.
758PC gains a locked bulletproof briefcase that's permanently chained to their left wrist. (Contains some very powerful information, too bad no known locksmith can open it)
759PC's voice becomes completely different depending on what language they're speaking.
760Magical effects cause the PC to emit a pungent scent of the sea.
761PC becomes a were-zombie. (If already a zombie, they become were-alive.)
762PC now feels the need to route out the communists.
763PC is now permanently afflicted with glitter.
764PC will always smell like freshly baked cookies. Might attract wildlife.
765PC gains a permanent smiley face button on their shoulder.
766PC is cloned, but doesn't know where the clone is.
767PC goes down one size category. (With no Ability Score change)
768PC lays an egg. (What kind is DMs choice.)
769PC gains very well defined and shiny muscles, and can show them off as a free action.
770PC learns to understand the next language they hear that they don’t currently know.
771PC grows a small unicorn horn that glistens in the sunlight. (Cannot attack with it, too small)
772PC's feet attract snakes. 10% chance of being poisonous.
773Whatever the PC kills becomes a tombstone.
774PC permanently forgets how to cast their most recently cast spell, and gain a different random spell to replace it.
775PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
776PC attracts suspicious little red glowing dots.
777PC gains a butterfly familiar. (The PC doesn't know it's their familiar though)
778PC remembers the night a wizard knocked them out, polymorphed them, and stole their original identity.
779If the PC falls in love (truly), then whoever they love will mysteriously and spontaneously combust the next day.
780To only the PC, puddles are always 10 ft. deep.
781PC gains a pencil-thin mustache, a thick British accent, and an urge to lift one eyebrow.
782Spectacular lightning strikes flares overhead when the PC's name is said.
783PC looks like a ghost in the moonlight.
784PC can make a normal swim check to swim through the ground. (Like getting to underground places) Failing the check results in entombment.
785Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
786PC's whistle sounds like a contrabass saxophone.
787PC can boils small quantities of water by staring at it for 1d6 rounds.
788PC invents the Harpmonicsicordiphone.
789PC breathes out harmless lightning clouds. Can shock/distract people.
790PC has what it takes to be an Olympic-level vagrant.
791PC goes down one size category.
792When PC is submerged in the ocean, they transform into a blue whale. They must beach themselves to turn back. Their equipment expands to fit them.
793PC's hair becomes as strong as steel.
794PC no longer has a midsection. (Still eats normally)
795At the start of every encounter the PC must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
796PC gains their own brain as their familiar. It can exist harmlessly outside of their body.
797PC can breathe beneath only 5 ft. of water.
798PC attracts whatever they are afraid of.
799PC briefly glimpses into the chaotic omnicosm that underlies all reality, and gains some sort of inexplicable and incomprehensible wisdom as to the fundamental mechanisms of their existence.
800PC suddenly recalls a past life where they were a cat on a boat that had a mysterious cargo.
801PC petrifies all grass they walk on.
802Whenever the PC leaves the ground, they become as heavy as paper. (Will fall normally though)
803PC becomes intensely afraid of penguins. (Sphenisciphobia) (Penguins are not unknown to stalk people)
804PC is nourished by charcoal instead of food. (Food harmlessly burns in their mouth while they chew, can not be used to bite.)
805PC can pull their hand off, revealing a dagger attached outwards from their wrist. Their hand functions normally when sheathed and not.
806PC can make a DC 15 Concentration check to summon the nearest bird, friendly or not.
807Whenever the PC makes a fist, they become round spheres of steel. (Dmg 1d6 + Str.)
808PC's tears are a fine vintage white wine.
809Whenever the PC takes damage, they must make a DC 13 Fortitude save or fall unconscious for 1d4 rounds.
810Roll again, effect can be smithed into a weapon that imbues the effect onto whomever holds it. (Cheap materials, as well as a smith, are DMs choice)
811PC is surrounded constantly by a personal 'bubble'. When it pops, it takes 2 rounds to reform.
812Sand perpetually pours out of the PC's eye sockets when their eyes are open. PC sees normally.
813A random limb becomes only the functioning skeleton of it.
814PC can summon small versions of themselves that sit on their shoulders and argue with each other or other people.
815Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as fast, twice as much, etc.)
816PC's burp becomes the mating call of unicorns.
817PC becomes discretely stalked by a garden gnome.
818PC's nose bleeds when anything venereal is discussed.
819Doors will always hit the PC on the ass on the way out. (Tougher doors hit harder)
820Any casted magic that affects the PC causes water nearby to become holy/unholy. (Depending on alignment)
821PC is no longer related to anyone.
822PC's blood harmlessly becomes sand.
823PC's presence causes animals within 30 ft. to sing.
824Once per day, the PC becomes encased in a layer of brittle stone.
825PC can weave impressive wicker objects, but only while completely submerged in water.
826Whenever the PC makes a joke, a laugh track plays in the background.
827PC's HP is instantly (and only) reduced to 1 if struck with an unholy weapon, but is healed by holy weapons.
828PC perspires rainbows.
829Any door the PC tries to open instantly locks itself. (Can still be picked)
830Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the effect.
831Whenever the PC falls asleep, their clothes fly away and migrate south for the winter.
832Anything the PC kills is personally escorted to hell by the Grim Reaper.
833PC is now healed by mushrooms. (1d4 + Con modifier per shroom)
834PC sprouts a singing venus fly trap on their shoulder that sings when the PC is happy.
835PC can send messages to anyone they've met by speaking into a frog or toad.
836As long as the PC pets a creature, it is able to speak it’s mind.
837PC gains 3 fox tails.
838PC's blood becomes a blood elemental, and is very comfortable being inside the PC's body. Blood that leaves the PC's body will make its way back into the PC's wounds.
839PC's butt dispenses 10 ft. of rope per day.
840PC’s body is permanently covered in mummy wraps. (no stat change, preserve body upon death)
841PC can skip themselves off of water (10 ft.) with a DC 5 jump check, with each successive skip increasing the DC by 5.
842PC sings manly songs whenever they're in combat.
843PC can now focus hard enough to become a sword, but this does not include their clothing or equipment.
844A random party member can now hear the PC's thoughts.
845PC is now idolized by a dying race of flower fairies.
846Anything the PC kills becomes preserved forever.
847If the PC touches a plant, it glows in the dark.
848PC's right index finger (or equivalent) gives off a harmless red laser.
849The souls of whoever the PC kills linger around them in the form of small heatless balls of purple-ish fire.
850PC’s dreams are replaced with visions of being the last priest in a forgotten order.
851PC gains a wombat for a mount.
852Every time the PC is struck on the head with any force, they change to the opposite alignment.
853PC's sweat becomes a very lovely smelling perfume, reminiscent of the favorite memory of anyone who smells it.
854PC's body hair is replaced with 3 leafed clovers. (Can be searcched for a four leafed)
855PC comes upon an invincible key that explodes anytime it is inserted into a lock.
856PC no longer blinks. Anyone who stares too long into the PC's eyes will hear a Gregorian choir chanting louder and louder before passing out.
857PC can run across water, but if they stop or change direction, they sink.
858PC's eyes are permanently covered with shadow, and are impossible to see under any light.
859PC chooses an obscure food product. They become professionals in cooking it.
860PC’s mandible can be removed and thrown as a boomerang.
861PC learns how to foster squirmles, a tiny lovable but mischievous race of fuzzy worm things.
862PC now has green, copper based blood.
863PC does not cast a shadow.
864A 60 ft wide snowstorm surrounds the PC for 1d4 hours every 2 days at noon.
865PC is unable to talk around the undead.
866Any weapon the PC holds is able to talk, and is normally very eager to do so.
867PC learns recipe of random meal, gains the ingredients to prepare it, and will not be satisfied until they make the meal in a decent kitchen.
868PC finds their own baby. (What kind is DMs choice.)
869PC gains a grand piano familiar. (Summonable at-will, at ground level)
870PC learns to understand the next language they hear that they don’t currently know.
871People with magic are physically attracted to the PC.
872PC becomes a living statue in the light of a full moon.
873Continual fog empties out of the PC's ankles filling a 30 ft radius. 1 ft high.
874PC gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
875PC gains a grog addiction, if they don't consume one once per week, they take -1 to all ability scores, increasing by one each day without grog.
876PC can use wildlife as musical instruments.
877PC can chop non-magical wood with their bare hands.
878PC remembers the night a wizard knocked them out, and stole their brain. (It’s been replaced with a magical wooden replica)
879PC gains 1d4 different voices that they can use interchangeably at-will.
880Mysterious runes are visible on the PC’s skin in the moonlight.
881PC becomes unnaturally fascinated with piercing their body piercings. (Can be replaced with magical ones)
882PC's head can rotate 360 degrees around.
883PC's brain becomes clockwork, and must be wound every 24 hours. Otherwise PC's INT drops to 0 until it's wound again.
884PC can make a DC 15 fortitude check to cough up one lung. It grows back after 24 hours, until then, PC cannot run.
885Roll again, the effect is twice as strong. (Twice as long, twice as much, etc.)
886Whenever the PC goes to sleep, they are kidnapped for the amount of time they rest. After which they are returned to the exact same spot, fully rested.
887Around the PC, the moon appears to be constantly full at night.
888PC hiccups bubbles. 2d4 bubbles per round for 2d4 rounds when caught flatfooted (or surprised).
889PC can be nourished by awkward moments.
890PC is a professionally bad dancer.
891PC flips a coin to decide whether or not they should tell the truth. (Heads = truth, Tails = false)
892PC can only read and write languages they do not know how to speak.
893PC becomes addicted to casting the last spell they casted, and really enjoys casting it whenever they get the chance, or an excuse.
894PC occasionally and inexplicably becomes in possession of random people's underwear.
895At the start of every encounter the PC must succeed a DC 10 Will save or roll for a new alignment.
896PC can sheath any type of sword in their forearm, and not be hindered in their movement.
897PC gains a purple thumb that causes non-magical plants to whither and die.
898As long as the PC has throwing knives, they can inexplicably pull them out of any where on their person.
899PC fades into an existential quandary filled with angst and self-loathing. After 1d8 days of recovery, they will gain a perspective of persistent optimism, because nothing will be as a bad as that.
900PC suddenly feels as though they are being remembered by a future life.
901PC gives birth to a litter of (DMs choice).
902PC's head is removable. It will remain active, as well as the body.
903PC gains a talking tattoo. Roll for tattoo's alignment.
904PC is able to lick an enemy to paralyze them for 1d6 rounds. Fortitude save DC 10 + PC's level negates.
905Everytime the PC dances, a natural disaster happens somewhere. (2% chance it happens right where the PC is)
906PC's consciousness swaps with a future incarnation from the 21st century. (No stat change)
907PC can now directly communicate with their god, but cannot get help from them.
908PC can identify any substance by ingesting it.
909PC is burned by water, except when they drink it.
910Roll again, the effect spreads to casters that cast magic on the PC. (Lasts 1 day/PC level)
911From now on, whenever the PC meets a new person, the new person will only ever be able to dream about the PC.
912Whatever the PC guesses will always be correct, but no one will ever believe them.
913PC is able to be used as a great club by other characters in the same size category. PC takes half damage minus their armor bonus.
914PC becomes a dragon in a human form with the same stats as they had before, but has forgotten how to polymorph.
915Roll again, the effect is thrice as strong. (Thrice as fast, thrice as much, etc.)
916It's now impossible to describe the PC's physical appearance, leaving people exasperated if they try.
917PC is made of felt. (But takes all damage normally)
918PC can use animal husbandry to allow any two creatures to birth hybrid offspring.
919PC grows 1d10 new and mysterious organs in their abdomen.
920Any casted magic that affects the PC causes all nearby wildlife to double in size.
921PC's singing attracts hostile creatures.
922If the PC opens a closet, there will always be a dead body in it.
923PC's middle name becomes "Danger".
924PC can shoot anything with a bow that they can lift.
925PC gets a +1 to all checks while the sun is out, and a -1 to all checks while the sun is down.
926Whoever makes eye contact with the PC cannot help but laugh.
927PC cannot go to sleep while above ground.
928PC can plane shift once per day, and move 5 spaces before coming back to the material plane. They have a 60% chance of bringing something back with them, and a 20% chance of it being friendly.
929PC is severely allergic to intimacy. (Symptoms include sneezing, nasal congestion, and inflammation of the eyes.)
930Roll again, the next living thing the PC touches also receives the effect.
931PC is physically moved to tears whenever they part with any of their money.
932PC is abducted by aliens, probed, surgically implanted with an unknown alien device, and is put back in the same spot about 10 minutes later.
933Beneath the PC's skin, they become entirely clockwork. They take damage and die normally, and don't feel any different.
934Whenever the PC kills a creature, they give the PC a recipe of a mixed cocktail drink that highlights their life.
935PC will randomly trip and crash into party members of the opposite sex. Ending up on top of each other with one of them holding the other's breast. (At DMs discretion)
936Once per day, the PC can summon a stream of 600 butterflies to swarm themself for 1d4 rounds, blinding everyone including the PC within 40 ft. until they're dispersed.
937PC learns every recipe there is to cooking and serving the slain bodies of their enemies.
938PC can cure any disease, remove any poison, or remove any condition by being afflicted by the condition themselves.
939For any sneak attempts, the PC can instead say, "You can't see me, I'm hiding." to anyone who might see them for the same effect.
940PC’s body turns into a medium sized minotaur. (no stat change)
941PC becomes a dimensional rift that alternate realities can enter through.
942PC is possessed by a demon that acts the exact same way as the PC did beforehand. The demon is detected by Detect Evil, but is the same alignment of the PC.
943PC becomes irresistibly cute, but only while on fire.
944Once per day, the PC can vomit freshly caught fish.
945PC makes their own god up and worships it. (It also exists due to it being worshiped.)
946All Gods abandoned the PC.
947PC's consciousness visits the modern era in their dreams, by taking the body of a future incarnation.
948PC is abducted by aliens for 1d4 days. (DMs choice of what happens)
949PC has a 30 ft aura of a full-moon. (Affects were-creatures)
950PC’s dreams are replaced with visions of incomprehensibly horrendous Lovecraftian horror-terrors from beyond.
951The Aurora Borealis are always above the PC at night.
952PC is now a werewolf.
953The PC's heart becomes the perfect phylactery for anyone aspiring to become a lich.
954The PC is considered dead for the duration they sleep. When they wake up, they are resurrected.
955PC finds a notebook detailing how they were built in a lab.
956PC is not comfortable sleeping unless they're hanging upside down from their feet.
957PC becomes married to the sea. If PC already has a spouse, they will kill them and become a sailor. (Doesn't leave the party)
958PC goes up one size category. (With no Ability Score change)
959PC can make a DC 17 Will Save to grow a fabulous and amazing mustache.
960PC is immune to all compulsory effects, but only if they’re completely naked and not carrying anything.
961PC can make a DC 13 Strength check to punch into the ground and pull out any type of vegetable.
962PC's presence causes bubbles to explode. 2d4 fire damage each.
963PC ceases to age, but will die at the end of their lifespan.
964Whenever the PC is cold or freezing, they become undead. When they are warmed up again, they come back to life.
965No ship can float while the PC is on board, however, they can be sailed underwater.
966PC becomes aware of a contract they have with the mole people to defile any gardens they happen to pass by. (Farms don't count, petunia bushes do)
967PC's long lost fraternal twin will visit the PC soon.
968PC now regularly lays eggs (regardless of sex). (The DM decides how often the PC lays eggs, how many eggs, and what kind of eggs)
969PC degenerates into an earlier form of their race. (No stat change)
970PC gains a random language.
971PC can no longer speak unless they are touching someone, and can only speak in the languages of the person they are touching.
972PC becomes permanently drunk.
973PC has an aura of badass-itude.
974PC gains once per day use of a spell equal to Cha modifier. (Use modifier for DC)
975Every time the PC is alone, they always have a chance of finding their own dead body that who’s cause of death is different each time. (The bodies do not have equipment, only the PC’s undergarments)
976Whatever the PC kills will come back to life as a zombie immediately. 50% of being friendly. All creatures die permanently at midnight the day they were raised.
977PC ascends to a higher dimension, learns how to exist in this dimension, and then instantly pops back into the material plane with no memory of the event. (May have made friends, or enemies in their time)
978PC remembers that they were once a criminally deranged wizard who had knocked themselves out and wiped their own mind of everything they had done.
979The name and face of everyone the PC kills is automatically tattooed to their skin when they die.
980Tomorrow, PC will save the life of whom fate has decreed must die.
981All of the PC's criticals and fumbles are twice as effective as they normally were.
982PC explosively sheds their skin once a month, starting now. (2d6 force/fire damage, 10 ft. radius)
983PC's urine morphs trees into treants. They won't be happy you peed on them.
984PC can swallow ores and defecate the refined material.
985Roll again, the effect is thrice as strong. (Thrice as long, thrice as much, etc.)
986PC can make a DC 10 + Animal's HD Will Save to make mundane animals fall unconscious.
987PC reproduces by budding. (Still needs a mate)
988PC can summon a magical gong at will and hit it for whatever reason they feel like. The gong doesn't do anything because it's a gong.
989PC's only mode of transportation is the moon walk.
990PC receives their diploma in Dilly-Dallying from the College of Substantial Whimsy.
991PC has an hardcore aura. Everything they do is pretty hardcore.
992The absolute most crazy and absurd things will happen to the party, but only when the PC isn't around.
993PC can store normal sized ships in bottles.
994PC is detected by any Detect spell.
995Nothing happens. (What are the odds?)
996The PC is aware that the next time they die, they bursts into flames destroying all flammable gear and is resurrected.
997PC becomes best friends with an epic wizard that only ever comes around to ask for loans of money to fund their crazy ideas.
998Every time the PC levels up, they have a choice of switching to a different class of the new total level
999PC briefly glimpses into the chaotic omnicosm that underlies all reality. After 1d10 days of recovery, PC gains some sort of inexplicable and incomprehensible wisdom as to the fundamental mechanisms of their existence.
1000/0PC is divided by zero.

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